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TO MARSHMALLOW OR NOT TO MARSHMALLOW? IS THAT A QUESTION? by Joel Benson Let me clear this up, once and for all, before it becomes an international incident. I'm sure with a little history under your belt (and about 400 calories) you will comprehend why this whole issue is ridiculous. Go back about 650 years (1438 A.D., I believe, it was a Thursday) to an icy cold January day in Delft. The temperature was so low that even Lord Kelvin didn't get out of bed. Unfortunately this did not stop little seven year old Evie Brudjenwinkel. Having just received a new Frisbee for her birthday (naturally made of wood) she was outside playing catch with Huygens, her Brussels Griffon. All of a sudden, a strong gust of wind from the Black Sea commandeered the disc whipping it here and there, to and fro, up and down, etc., finally resting in the bottom of a well. The ever-so-playful but ever-so-dumb Huygens followed the toy down the shaft. Evie, not more than one rung above Huygens on the evolutionary ladder attempted to reach out to him, falling short by about five meters, and soon toppling in herself. Fortunately, her shrieks attracted the attention of the nearby milkmaids who alerted the townspeople to the tragedy. However, they were stymied by the fact that they had recently run out of rope so could not hoist her and, with the freezing temperature, no water was available by which to fill the well and drive her and Huygens to the surface. Beyond that, she complained of a soreness in her rump. Then, clever Hans, her classmate at the Tulip and Sabot School had an idea. First he threw a fluffy pillow down the well to soothe her rump. Then, being a corpulent lad, convinced his plus-size mother to start boiling milk (about 650 liters). With the stove all afire he collected all the cocoa in Delft, as well in the local villages of Wedgwood and Limoge. With that brewing, all the citizens of the town constructed a vast bucket brigade, hurtling the steamy beverage down the well. This not only provided Evie with immediate sustenance but began to float her up to the top, with her downy soft, pure white pillow topping the foam. Thus, the dawn of the world's favorite winter refreshment, and, by tradition, always accompanied by the white, floating "pillow". Before I close, two follow-ups:
Hot chocolate is incomplete with out marshmallows. The two opposing forces, like hot and cold, keep the universe spinning. by Anna Wen View Larger Image  |
